Written By : Micaleb Lawrence
Don’t go breaking yourself when you feel like you’re going crazy trying to juggle all things life comes with. If you feel like it is getting too much, just breath. It probably is but…Breath. That’s what all the Instagram quotes with #Healing say. They tell us to breath and to take things one day at a time.
So, I breath and hope healing comes from it. Deep down I think we all know healing happens with time. There shouldn’t be a rush to the process of growing and following the year 2020 and all the challenges the world is currently facing I think we’ve adopted some sort of coping mechanism. Or at least I have. Not that it helps much to sit on my bed and wander off into the moments of some memories I wish I cherished for a little while longer. I often wonder who I am to sit by my bedroom window and wish for everlasting joy. Do I even deserve it? I’m certain someone beyond my bedroom window deserves joy and healing more than I do yet my ego tries to convince me otherwise. Yes, there it is. The ego, holding me back from the healing I claim to be in such need of. Eventually I’ll stop demanding this healing and I’ll breath in hopes of finding some sort of growth a few days later. Maybe weeks, or even years from now I would be healed. Who knows?
We all know that the first step to any form of rehabilitation is to accept that you have a problem. In essence, I doubt we all know what our problem is. We are so consumed by the superficial things we neglect the ideals we were taught; we forget why we’re here in the first place. Why I am writing an article in my room, why you are reading this article and why life has thrown us so far off we barely have answers. I have an answer. One that I have been searching for, one that will eventually help me in my healing process. I asked myself why I do this? Why do I write? Why do I find comfort in the very thing that would scare me when I was in 7th Grade? When my teacher asks me to write about my favorite holiday I tense up because I know I have to read it in front of an entire class of 7th Graders who probably had a better favorite holiday than I did. However, it took me some years until I sat by my bedroom window and appreciated that moment. Appreciated the moment that took me from writing a speech in class to read out loud and appreciate the little things. Appreciate people attentively listening to me and my holiday. That was beautiful, I was healing from having heard someone else’s great holiday story and the envious thoughts of wanting to go overseas like they did had left my mind and in that moment I grew, just a little bit but I did and there is some beauty in that.
There is some beauty in knowing that I write for other people and I write for 13-year-old me who just wanted to have my story about a silly green frog I saw on my holiday heard.
If my adolescence has taught me one thing, its that many things is needed to grow but you need to start with the first thing. Acceptance. Acceptance that just like things, people come and go. But, the time you spend thinking about all of this is what contributes to your growth the most.
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