by Freddy Nyezi
I walked into the shop an innocent –
My hands, my mind and
My intentions
Were clean.
I was the only person of colour and
There definitely had been a shift
In the atmosphere of the
Convenience store,
I was already
A suspect.
The CCTV cameras had served no purpose
Because their gawking eyes and their
Scrunched-up noses surveiled and
Judged my every move. I took
Out the hundreds that nested
In my pocket and counted
Them carefully – I was
Justifying myself,
Explaining, that
I too was a
Customer.
I walked around some more but
Found nothing I wanted. I
Deposited my cash into
My pockets and my
Fists followed. I
Walked
Towards the exit. My hands were empty
But my heart was heavy. Just before
I walked past those scanner-beeper
Thingies at the door, I said a silent
Prayer and hoped that they
Wouldn’t go off and that
Nothing had fallen into
My pocket to give
Those people
Their satisfaction.
I exited the store.
The scanner-beeper thingies were silent.
I was a bit relieved but I couldn’t help but
Feel guilty.
I had already stolen something by
Simply walking into the store.
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